Wallace Beery, right: “You seem a bit out of sorts, my pet.”
Joan Crawford, left: “Of course I’m out of sorts. Did you see how they treated me when we checked into this awful hotel?
Wallace: “My dear, this is one of the most exquisite hotels in the country. The staff is extremely professional and discreet. If you don’t want to flush your bidet, they will do it for you and leave a mint on the bathroom counter.”
Joan: “I’m not talking about candy in the john, you fool. I’m talking about the way they looked at me while you were signing us in. It was very clear that they thought I was useless and couldn’t contribute in any way.”
Wallace: “Well, at that moment, my dear, you couldn’t contribute. You don’t have any money.”
Joan: “They don’t know that. I can’t imagine why they would have such wicked…
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